Several years ago, when my SIL's middle son's girlfriend got pregnant I asked my SIL (jokingly) if she wanted me to do a little sex-ed/birth control refresher course for my nephews and her 2 other kids. (I had taught it earlier that year to kids younger than those 4.) She thought that A having a kid had scared them enough to not do anything stupid. One might think that A and his girlfriend having a second kid (born this winter) would have reminded the other 4 that they don't want to do anything stupid. Apparently not. My nephew's girlfriend is preggers. First of, I don't envy my brother having to tell his mother. Secondly, I wish them the best of luck as they will need it. This nephew hasn't had (AFAIK) the most stable employment record and much of it has been waiting tables. Also, last I heard, he was living with his mother. Boy, wouldn't that be fun?
Maybe his life has taken a turn for the better in the last 6 months or so. Maybe he, and she, have decent jobs with health insurance and sick leave. I can hope.
A couple of questions for my readers: Do you think there is a market for someone to fill in the gaps potentially left by a school's sex-ed? (if school does abstience only) Could the fact that A is a student (and I think his GF too) and they are doing OK be the reason my nephew's GF is expecting? How likely is it that my nephew and GF are the one in one thousand whom the pill fails? (or whatever method) In other words, were they actually taking all appropriate precautions (short of keeping it zipped up) and still got pregnant?
Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts
16 March 2009
29 June 2007
Public Service Message #69
Warning: This post may contain graphic descriptions of anatomy, sex, and "bad words." If you are easily offended don't read it.
A few weeks ago, I was hanging out with LS, her boyfriend, and some of their friends. One of the guys started talking about a friend of theirs (or at least known to several of the people there) whose recently-ex-girlfriend was "crazy." The primary examples given as proof was that when told to get off/up she would clamp down hard and stay put until the shooting match was over. It sounded to me like this couple were using the "pull-out" method of "birth control" (birth control is in qoutes because it is only birth control in the very loosest of definitions). I looked at LS with concern, she shook her head. I took this to mean that she didn't approve, either. (There then ensued a short round of comments on whether it was ok to just watch a girl spit or if you had to be sure she swallowed to be safe from fatherhood. I don't think I'd been in that crude of a conversation since high school.)
If you are considering useing the pull-out method as part of your no-baby plan, please read the following explanations as to why it DOES NOT WORK!
First of all, even if all goes as planned and 'coitus' is 'interuptus' there is no garuntee that one is safe from pregnacy. Pre-ejactulatory secretions (commonly referred to as "pre-cum") can contain sperm. Additionally, sperm deposited outside the vagina, perhaps on the labia, can make the journy up to the egg. (This is why "dry-humping" is not completely safe) Early withdrawal does almost nothing to protect from disease, as many disesase cuasing agents can be in the pre-ejaculatory secretions, as well.
Secondly, pulling out is hard to do. In my (admitadly limited) experience the last thing the guy or girl wants to do is pull out at the penultimate moment of sex. The instinct is to drive it home (forgive the image). (The more sperm deposited as far into the vagina as possible, raises the chances that one will make it to the egg.) It takes a lot of control on the part of the man to not only know when he is about to ejaculate but also be willing and able to pull out. It isn't easy on the woman either, she doesn't want him to pull out (her instincts are the same). Obviously, a more experienced man is more likely to sucessfully pull out before ejactulation than a younger, less experienced one, but see point #1. Unfortunately, young and less experienced men and women are more likely to believe this method will work and use it, instead of going to the drug store.
There are several proven, easy to use methods of birth control. Birth control pills are very reliable, as are condoms, and there are other methods that work well, too (diaphrams, sponges w/ spermicidal gel, and IUDs come to mind). Please, for the sake of your future, don't be stupid.
If you are going to have sex use condoms or birth control pills.
Better yet use both.
A few weeks ago, I was hanging out with LS, her boyfriend, and some of their friends. One of the guys started talking about a friend of theirs (or at least known to several of the people there) whose recently-ex-girlfriend was "crazy." The primary examples given as proof was that when told to get off/up she would clamp down hard and stay put until the shooting match was over. It sounded to me like this couple were using the "pull-out" method of "birth control" (birth control is in qoutes because it is only birth control in the very loosest of definitions). I looked at LS with concern, she shook her head. I took this to mean that she didn't approve, either. (There then ensued a short round of comments on whether it was ok to just watch a girl spit or if you had to be sure she swallowed to be safe from fatherhood. I don't think I'd been in that crude of a conversation since high school.)
If you are considering useing the pull-out method as part of your no-baby plan, please read the following explanations as to why it DOES NOT WORK!
First of all, even if all goes as planned and 'coitus' is 'interuptus' there is no garuntee that one is safe from pregnacy. Pre-ejactulatory secretions (commonly referred to as "pre-cum") can contain sperm. Additionally, sperm deposited outside the vagina, perhaps on the labia, can make the journy up to the egg. (This is why "dry-humping" is not completely safe) Early withdrawal does almost nothing to protect from disease, as many disesase cuasing agents can be in the pre-ejaculatory secretions, as well.
Secondly, pulling out is hard to do. In my (admitadly limited) experience the last thing the guy or girl wants to do is pull out at the penultimate moment of sex. The instinct is to drive it home (forgive the image). (The more sperm deposited as far into the vagina as possible, raises the chances that one will make it to the egg.) It takes a lot of control on the part of the man to not only know when he is about to ejaculate but also be willing and able to pull out. It isn't easy on the woman either, she doesn't want him to pull out (her instincts are the same). Obviously, a more experienced man is more likely to sucessfully pull out before ejactulation than a younger, less experienced one, but see point #1. Unfortunately, young and less experienced men and women are more likely to believe this method will work and use it, instead of going to the drug store.
There are several proven, easy to use methods of birth control. Birth control pills are very reliable, as are condoms, and there are other methods that work well, too (diaphrams, sponges w/ spermicidal gel, and IUDs come to mind). Please, for the sake of your future, don't be stupid.
If you are going to have sex use condoms or birth control pills.
Better yet use both.
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